March has been a challenging month here.
We’ve had four Nor’easters, no power for 9 days, and no internet for 14 days. We finally got power back. Yay!
This month’s events really spoke to me about taking control when we can, and when things are clearly out of our control, as in the weather, controlling how we respond to them.
What stood out to me most strongly were the situations where people could have taken control, but have seemingly lost confidence in their ability to do so.
Everyone’s probably heard about the puppy that died when placed in the overhead bin on the United flight from Houston to New York. What sticks with me about this tragedy is why no one stepped up to save this puppy.
This is also the time of #metoo, with people wondering how so many people looked the other way.
And it’s not just the big events. It’s all the little instances where people don’t act, don’t do something important for their business, don’t take care of themselves, or don’t speak up for a friend or colleague.
People have been speaking out more and trying to understand how these things have happened. Is it lack of empathy, fear of consequences, or lack of belief they could make a difference?
It’s clear to me that it was disconnection, trance, and a lack of belief that they could make a difference. So perhaps these events will help break us out of trance, help people become more aware, more in touch, and more willing to take action.
These situations highlight how we get stuck in trances and how we do—or don’t do—things that seem out of character for us. Knowing we can get caught in trances is crucial because when we recognize that we have gone off course we change it.
How do you know when you are in trance?
Once you are aware that we all fall into trance at times, you can learn to recognize it in yourself. There are different ways trance can manifest but some common ones are feeling disconnected, zoned out, or simply not present.
Disconnection can result in inaction or even misguided action. We don’t act as we would if we were more connected, more in touch with our feelings, and believed in our ability to make a difference. This leads us into situations where we come out thinking, “That wasn’t like me.” or, “I wish I had taken action.” This is what occurs when we’re not fully present to ourselves or what’s happening around us.
This may sound like a lot to tackle. Truth is, this is a situation where little changes yield huge benefits.
You can learn to notice when your energy goes weak or when you feel disconnected. You can learn to recognize what the state of not being present feels like for you. Being aware can help you shift into a stronger, more connected, more present state.
There are easy ways to shift when you notice that you aren’t feeling very confident or connected. One way is to drop into your body. Some simple ways to to do this are to touch your leg and pay attention to the feeling, lower your shoulders, breathe, or feel your feet on the ground or your butt in the chair. Another easy technique that will help you shift to a more present state is the Kazlow Anchor. This can be used anytime you are stuck in a feeling such as anger, grief, fear, or frustration—or when you are lacking in confidence or feeling disconnected. It enables you to shift in 10 seconds or less.
I’d love to hear what you think about where we are moving as a society and how you see this in your own life.
Where do you feel that you are disconnected or not showing up fully? Do you see it in not taking action in your business, not standing up for someone, not practicing self-care, or not going after opportunities? And, what are you ready to do about it?
Love to know!
From the No Doubt Zone,
Dr. K
